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Nurture Your Tribe: Part 3 – Sharing the Love

If you have been following this series (Part 1 and Part 2) and applying it, you have now found your tribe (what others call a target market) and started developing relationships, both one-on-one, and as a whole. You do this via your Facebook business page. If you are a smart marketer (and of course, you are!), you are also managing a Facebook group that targets your tribe.

Targets your tribe? Huh?

To the outside world, that might conjure up images of somebody pinned to a range target. In reality though, tribes love being a target.


They enjoy being in your sights because you are there to meet their needs. That should be your reason anyway. I suppose, for some, it might be a fake reason, but we will assume your heart's desire is to serve through your business.

Having assumed that, we are now going to share some ways to nurture that growing tribe by sharing the LOVE:

  • L for Leading by Example
  • O for Offering Help
  • V for Value...though, it is not what you might think
  • E is for Encouragement

What you will find is when you love your tribe and help meet their needs, they love you back. It shows in your profits, no matter what kind of business you have. What you give out, comes back.

So, let's learn how to LOVE our tribes!

“L” is for Lead by Example

People are not as dumb as some folks wish they were. The fact is, you can fool some people for awhile, but the truth of who you are will show through eventually. Many don't give much thought to that aspect of being ready to own a business, until the consequences are staring them in the face.

If who you are and the brand image you are trying to project don't match, fix that first. You must be authentic. You will not last in a leadership position if you aren't.

Authenticity is important for a couple of reasons.

The obvious one being that you can only be a fake for so long before the real you oozes out when you don't wish it to. It will start ruining the image. If you are a vegan nutrition consultant, may you never be found pigging out at the local BBQ joint.

A  less obvious reason to be authentic is because it is ever-so-much easier. Seriously!

What a waste of energy it is to maintain lies. You have to remember them, after having to think of them to begin with. If you don't work at being consistent, you'll blow it. We can soften it by calling it “hiding our rougher edges”. We can declare that “what I do in my personal life is my business”.  The fact is though, to be one thing in public and another in private is to live a lie.

When you can get real about that, you can then decide to live that way no more. Do it, if you have not already. If there are ugly areas you wish to hide, clean them up and make them fit for company. Problem solved.

Now that you are committed to authenticity, promise yourself to…

Be consistent in who you are.

You are your brand. The goal is to be predictable. People will grow to expect you to be you, so don't rock their boats too often by deviating from what is your norm.

For example, part of my brand image is “Hippie Warrior of Love” so let's pretend 90% of all my posts support that. Then imagine that about once a week or so, I come out with a vehement rant. Not the humorous kind, or a little harmless venting, or throwing something cute out to rev up traffic... but the out-for-blood type. 

Pretend I am feeling taken advantage of and by gosh golly, I am going to get even. It is not enough to remove myself from the situation, I want revenge and won't rest until I get it. I am blabbing on and on about it (we want support for our poor behavior, right?). That is so far out in left field from the vibe I normally project, every time I do that, I create doubt in people's minds about my authenticity.

Am I so together that I never get irritated? Heck no. I am human, and an Irish human to boot, so the potential for drama is there. I choose to walk in peace. I don't go down to their level, but battle on the higher road and do my best to stick to it. It is who I chose to be, therefore, I am.

Again, it comes down to making sure that what you are putting out there is true to begin with. If what is true is also ugly, deal with that, so you are the person of integrity you project. That consistent, authentic person is who they will grow to trust, and count on to offer help is being a leader they can trust.

“O” is for Offer Help

An important thing to remember when offering help to your tribe is the 80/20 Rule. Make 80% of your posts about everything BUT your promotions.

Yes, the big picture goal is to sell your solutions and make money. But there are better ways to get there than by shoving them down people's throats day in and day out. All that will do is get you tuned out.

When you LOVE your tribe, you want to help meet their needs even when the answer is not you. That doesn't necessarily mean you only share others' products either. Focus more on what your tribe's actual needs are, and on finding ways to meet them. Then creating and sharing posts that accomplish that will become easy and natural.

Keep their needs in front of you and you will notice that article or post that will be of help to them. Share it.

When they are on your mind and you meet somebody, who would be a valuable resource to them, you think of them. Share the connection.

If the back of your mind is always churning on how you can help'll notice that amazing gizmo that will transform their lives. Then you'll run to get online and share it with them.

That steadfast focus on their needs makes it easy to find the 80% non-promotional posts. Then they will trust you when you post the other 20% that tells them your product is the answer for their need. That love you show by nurturing them and putting them first will pay off. The key though is to see the pay off as the icing. Meeting needs is what you do.

That different mindset is behind our next point as well...

“V” is for Value

Each tribe member is a potential customer with monetary value to you. That is not our focus here though. Our focus is on how you should value them. It is a different mindset. The former says they are there to serve you. The latter says you are there to serve them. You are not lord over your tribe, but servant to them.

Adopting that perspective is powerful. That is heart-centered marketing. That is the way to thrive in business. Then there is the added bonus of getting to sleep soundly at night, knowing you are making a difference in people's lives.

Like I said earlier, people are not as dumb as some wish they were. They can tell when you care. Value them, not just for the money they can bring in. Care about them. Be concerned for their needs. Put real effort into meeting those needs. Sometimes, it can be as simple as something to make them smile.

“E” is for Encouragement

If there is one thing everyone could use, even if they don't want to admit it... it is encouragement. It doesn't matter what niche you serve, who your tribe is, or what it is you sell. If you encourage people, they feel good, and come back for more.

Rich folks need it. The perfect specimens of health need it. The beautiful people... they need it too. The super-heroes and champions... the wildly successful. All those people who have the things we think are so important. We tend to think they lack for nothing. They still glow when encouraged.

One of my favorite Maya Angelou quotes says” I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Make them feel good. Build them up. Praise them. Tell them you are proud. Show unconditional love and I promise you, they will keep coming back for more....and bring their friends with them. Think about the people in your life who encourage you and make you feel good. Would you walk away from that for no good reason? Nope. Not likely. Neither will your tribe, when your concern is genuine and you dare to show it.

Do YOU Dare to L.O.V.E Your Tribe?

I said, “dare to” because loving others involves risk. Anyone who has ever had a broken heart understands that. Putting out love risks rejection, betrayal, ridicule, getting bad juju back for your trouble... it risks getting hurt. The fact it happens is real...and the pain of it is real too.

But you can decide to love anyway.

You can love when it hurts. You can love when it is inconvenient. You can love when those you love don't deserve it. You love because it is in you to give and others need it. The fact that they respond to it is just a matter of you getting back some of the good you put out.

What are some of the ways you show your love and nurture your tribe? How do they respond to it? We'd love to hear all about your experiences, so feel free to comment. Let's talk!

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Are You Authentic, or Just a Little Weird?

Authenticity. It is the cry of the masses for something real. It's also a super-popular buzz
phrase right now. Books are being written about it. We seek it in others. We strive to be
authentic ourselves, but are we authentic, really? Do we even know what it means?

What IS Being Authentic Anyways?

If we draw a conclusion based upon what we see around us, and as people jump on that authenticity bandwagon, we might think being authentic means you are just letting your weird hang out.
My American Heritage Dictionary defines authenticity as the quality or condition of being genuine. Genuine, it defines as “actually possessing the alleged or apparent
What that means is, your weird should only hang out if you are genuinely, truly
weird. If you actually ARE weird, by all means, let your odd little light shine. But the value of authenticity is not necessarily in weirdness, but in simply being who you are, without compromise.
Sounds easy, doesn't it? Like many things though, it takes some effort to walk out consistently. Most of us have developed a bad habit over the years....the habit of hiding the truth of who we are.

Why Do We Hide Ourselves Away?

Usually, it is a simple fear of what others will think. So we pick a mask and start wearing it.
If you do something long enough, it becomes a habit. When you factor in that most of us
have been receiving messages from birth to blend in, not rock the boat, tone ourselves
down etc....well, often it seems much more natural to be the fake version of ourselves. After a time, it can become difficult to know where the real you ends and the act begins.
If you want to be effective in your business, in your life, in making your contribution to the whole of mankind....acting like something you are not must end.
You must understand that you are your gift to this world. Not the make-believe version of you, but the real you. When you hold back the parts the world needs, well, it's like having one missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle. You can try to put something else in there to make it look right, but it never will. Only that one piece makes it complete.
You are that one special piece in a great big, rather impersonal world. YOU matter. Not just a little bit. There are gifts within you that nobody else can give.

Don't Deprive the World of Your Unique You!

You might be thinking, “but if I am my true self, my business will suffer because people will not like the real me”. Don't you dare run with that conversation in your head. Let me tell you why...
First of all, how do you know people will not adore the real you if you don't give them a chance to see who that is? You don't know. Enough said on that.
I can almost hear the “buts” coming at me now. But, nothing. If there are real parts of
you that aren't worthy of public consumption, become who you want to be. Don't fake it,
become it

Why Would You Want to Do the Crazy Thing and Be You, Only You, ALL THE TIME?

Because it is a super power. Yes, the gift of you is for the world....but it is for you as
well. Cool how that works. When you flow as you should, success becomes so effortless it seems magical. It's not that it takes any less work, but that the work you do, hits bulls eyes.
Remember, success is based upon relationships. Real relationships that develop trust. It is about finding your tribe and nurturing them. We recently did a post on that. If you
missed it, you can find it by CLICKING HERE!
If the tribe you find is based on a fake version of you that you think they want, there is
no power in it, and it is exhausting to keep up with. Yes, I know that from experience.
Okay. Hopefully, at this point, you have a new commitment to being genuinely who you
are. If not, go back, re-read this and ponder why you should, and when you are there with the rest of us, just jump back in at this point.
Woohoo! So here we are all fired up about being authentic.

Now What? How Do We DO That?

The first step is to discover for yourself who you are. Most of us, by the time we are adults, have already buried parts of us and started giving people what we think they want  
instead. As I said earlier, after awhile, fake seems more natural. You can lose track of the real you.
To find that person again, think back to when you were a child. What made you happy?
What did you do with all that free time you had as a child? How did you play when given free reign to play the way you want? What did you dream of doing when you grew
I suggest you actually write these things down, hopefully in a journal. Then you can look back and enjoy seeing how you worked through the process and came back to who
you are.
Make a list of just random, off-the-top-of-your-head things you love. What makes you smile? What gives you peace? What makes you want to jump up and down with joy?
Cut loose with it and freely write whatever comes to mind. As you start getting in that vibe, you will feel it starting to come out easier and quicker. You've started unstopping the dam you created to hold yourself back. Go with it.
Don't limit yourself to things society deems appropriate for grown ups. If you loved to climb trees as a child, write it down and enjoy feeling what you'd feel when you climbed trees. Don't just remember it. Feel it. That feeling is you coming back to life

Doesn't it Feel Oh-So-Grand?

What is next? More of the same. You will find working on that project will become your happy place. You've found the amazing person you are and it feels fabulous. Now it is time to dabble in letting that inner child loose again.
This is the challenging part for most of us because it means you must trust. You must trust what I am saying, and trust yourself. But there is such magic on the other side, you will do it anyway.
Start indulging in the things you loved. Feed the parts of you that delight in what they need to grow. They will, and the results will be beautiful. You will begin to shine. People who are like you will sense that you are genuine and naturally gravitate towards you, and trust you.
Keep walking in that, growing in that, and sharing the real you with the world and it will respond. Sure, there will be those who reject the true you. It can even be family and
those closest to you. But stand strong and trust that things are as they should be and let go of a need for acceptance. All it does is dim your lovely little light. Feeding what  thrills you makes that light stronger. Makes you powerful. Creates success that you walk right into, quite naturally.

Here's an Example from My Life

Let me give you an example from my own life of the power in that. I am a writer and
speaker, so communicating with people is what I do, and why I am here.
It used to be, except for my accent, to read my writing or hear me speak, I sounded just like anyone else. I used all the proper nomenclature (which I had to learn to use because my mind sees things differently) and would share things in a way I thought people wanted them. I even looked the part as a speaker. I was in the home schooling industry and that meant a conservative blue jean jumper with tennis shoes. So, I'd dress the part.
I was not being myself. I was saying and doing, and trying to think, just like those in my niche. I'd keep my radically different ways of seeing things to myself. That is being mediocre, at best, and a sure fire way to have mediocre success. Not to mention, it took a lot of effort to cram myself into a mold and keep me there.
Now, twenty years later, I give into myself. I communicate in the unique way my mind produces it. Sometimes the things I say make absolutely no sense to people. But... there are those who it resonates so strongly with, they get understanding.

Isn't the Goal of Communication Understanding?

To develop an understanding in others of what you are trying to get across? Kabam! Mission accomplished... instant bond and a foundation
for a relationship based on intuitive trust.
While it is true that you might rise to the top of your field a little slower that way, the end results are worth the effort. Keep putting yourself out there, genuinely as you are. Your tribe will find you and the bond will be real and lasting.
As you serve your tribe, it will seem effortless. As long as you keep being authentic, you are in the magic zone. And that is just the beginning. A whole new world opens up before you when you remove limits from who you are and how you think and what you do. There is freedom and power in that. And it is free. It is accessible inside of. All you have to do is find it and get used to letting it shine.
Think of the innovators, the mover and shakers in your industry. Are they carbon copies of everyone else? Nope. They never are. That is why there are where they are in life. They dared to be themselves with gusto.

Are You Brave Enough to Do the Same?

Start today to get to know the real you, and commit to letting your unique light shine.
Then get out there and be shiny! I look forward to seeing the difference it makes in your
Please, if this touched you, or if you have any feedback, please comment, like and share. 

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Nurture Your Tribe: Part 1 – The Journey Begins

Helping your audience to connect with you, AKA "the feels", is the key to success in social media - And the key to amassing your tribe.

Keep it before you, always. Don't lose sight of the goal of making people feel so good, they keep coming back for more. When they come away from your page, group, or site, it should be with a warm fuzzies and the knowledge that they matter to you.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
Maya Angelou
American Poet, Memoirist, and Civil Rights Activist

The Feels

With that as your goal, you need to learn to master social media marketing on Facebook. No other site gives you more tools to engage with your audience than they do. They have what you need to not only find your tribe of fans, but to take excellent care of them once you do.

So, let's learn HOW to take advantage of that and develop trust through strong connections. It is not about pitching things to people, but building genuine relationships with them through a variety of means, including your personal blog or website, Facebook pages, groups and communities.

We are going to teach you how to nurture those you come in contact with, so they become life-long fans. They will be your tribe, your people....among those dear to your heart. They will also be your happy customers who send you even more business. So, yes...all this nurturing does dramatically affect your bottom line. However, that should not be your focus. When you go heart first into your business relationships, and nurture first, the money comes as a natural result.

Let's be about the business of learning how to do that and do it well.

Who Is Your Tribe?

One of the definitions Merriam Webster gives for tribe is, "a group of persons having a common character, occupation, or interest". Another mentions they have a common leader. That leader, like it or not, is you and you need to assume that role. You need to lead and nurture that tribe of people bound by common interests and values.

Strong leaders don't boss people around; they support, encourage, and set the example. To do that well takes heart. Use your heart in your business. The tribe will then follow. As trust develops in the relationship they have with you, they will do what you suggest in your calls to action more often. The numbers will reflect the effectiveness of leading with love towards those you serve through your business.

Now that you have a tribe, what to do with them?

The first step is to get to know them.
Once you know them, you nurture them and help meet their needs.
Then, you have the trust you need to convert them to customers as well.

Happy customers will be reflected in your profits. It is that win-win situation we should always strive for. Now, let's learn how to create that.

Getting to Know Your Tribe

This should be the first step, but sadly, it is often skipped. Too many simply assume they know their fans.

Why would you want to rely on assumptions when you have the ability to find out, for real? I know, it is crazy obvious to me too, but some people don't seem to grasp that concept. You, being the super-smart marketer you are, will put effort into getting to know where your tribe is REALLY coming from.

How about simply asking them? This is so obvious, but again, many miss it. Most people are anxious to be heard. They want to connect with those who they feel understand them and care about what concerns them. We live in a pretty impersonal world. Give people a chance to be heard and most will take it.

There are a variety of ways to ask and should use a little bit of everything because what motivates one person to act might not motivate the next. Some ways to ask your tribe what they want are through surveys and polls. You can use surveys in your email marketing, you can have poll posts onyour Facebook business page, as well as groups and communities you administrate.

Or - you can also simply ask. There is absolutely nothing wrong with creating Facebook posts that simply ask a question, in a way that will bring responses. That not only gives you information you can use about their wants and needs, but every comment counts too. That's a win-win. It also shows you really care, which we assume you do. Like I said, people want to be heard, so you want to give them opportunities to be.

Nurturing Your Tribe

Facebook gives you multiple opportunities to give your people what they have told you they want. You can deliver it to them via your business page posts, or through administrating groups and communities. Let's take a look at each one.

Page Posts

Page posts should always give your fans something they can use, need, or enjoy. If you know they need encouragement, write encouraging posts. If they need information, give it to them. If it is opportunities they need, help provide them. It's even okay to simple give them something to laugh at from time to time.

Point them in directions that will help them, and don't be stingy with directing them to places other thanyour own site and products or services. Not only are you then meeting their needs more fully, but you are developing trust by showing you care enough to help without profiting from it financially.

Of course, sometimes the sending them elsewhere will be via an affiliate link, but since we are ethical, we are open about that, right? Full disclosure and honesty about such things goes far in building trust and loyalty.

Facebook Groups and Communities

If you are not taking advantage of groups and communities on Facebook, you are missing out on one ofthe best ways to build relationship with your tribe. In both instances, you are gathering a group of people around a central interest. You audience in a group or community is there because they already have an interest in what you are doing. You are no longer trying to find your people, you have them... ready, willing, and eager to be nurtured by you.

This is an area where you can really shine as the loving leader of your tribe. The same principles about posting apply here, only it is to a more targeted audience, so you typically get more engagement. This is a place to get more intimate yourself, which helps create an environment where the members feel free to openly share too. This is where you can get cozy with them and deliver the warm fuzzies that keep them coming back for more.

Selling Your Tribe

Now you have found your tribe, you have taken excellent care of meeting their needs, you've demonstrated your love for them and they have trust in you. You have a real relationship with your fans. Now, you can motivate them to sales quite naturally. It is easy for you, feels right to them, and everybody comes out of the relationship happy. Is that not what it is all about?

Hopefully, this has helped light a fire within you to make the extra efforts to nurture your tribe. The effectiveness of all that loving kindness and care will be evident in your sales, and referrals. Happy customers tell their friends.

In future blog posts, we are going to go into more detail about how to nurture like a pro. Follow along, applying what you learn and you will see your engagement and sales increase as a result.

If you have questions please comment or connect with us! Since we practice what we preach... we really do want to know how you feel and what you need! Talk to us. We love to listen.

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